Don’t take it personally

How do we support each other during trying times? It is a position I find myself in at the moment. My daughter-in-law’s mother is extremely ill. She has been in the hospital for over a week and has good and bad days. I love my family and want to help. I am a direct person that takes control sometimes to relieve the stress of others, but this time, I believe I overstepped the boundaries. I upset my daughter-in-law because of my approach. She felt I was trying to take control away from her. I did not intend this to be the case and for the last five days she has been very ugly to me. I know it is because of her stress of all that is happening with her.

Today I decided to face her and let her know how I want to be her support through this rough time. I cried. The pain was deep. But my taking responsibility for my actions and asking her how I can be help to her, let her take back the control.

I have the grandchildren with me so that she can have some alone time to work through her feelings. That was her request. I learned that I was wrong to assume what she needs. Ask. It is the best thing to do. Things are better now.

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